My new addiction...

Yes, I realize I am like 8 years behind everyone else in the world with technology and gadgets, and my Kindle doesn't excite anyone but me and my kids- but I'M LOVING IT! Honestly, I have played more Solitaire, Pac Man & Tetris than I should admit, but I don't even care! We have Netflix so I get to watch movies through it too. What I just realized a few days ago was that there were a ton of reality shows on there as well and I am hooked. Don't worry, I am still watching Office almost every night, but for the past 2 days I have been GLUED to the show Hoarders. I had seen clips when we would travel home and stay in hotels with cable, but we never had cable at home so I never had the chance to sit down and really watch an eposide. Well, I think I've watched at least 17 eposides now and I can't stop. I am completely wrapped up in it and their lives, and their issues and the filth. I should have become a theripst- I love psychology, self help books, serial killer novels, biography's- you name it- anything about people and how their minds work- I am hooked. (Although I have had to lay off some of the serial killer stuff, my anxiety is a little too crazy and I don't sleep well anymore with too much of that yucky stuff on my mind)Anyway, the show breaks my heart. It makes me feel sad, angry and judgemental. I feel claustrophobic and anxious when I watch it, but it makes me want to get in there and help them clean and organize. I am fasinated and think if I went into the field, it would be helping hoarders in some way. It just mystifies me. I understnd collecting things and having collections get out of control- I understand the emotional attatchment to objects that have obvious corralations- but what I can't wrap my mind around is the absolute filth in which most of these people live. Why the filth? Why rotting animals in your house? Why feet of soiled adult diapers piling up in the bathroom? Why oozing liquids coming from the refrigerator? And black toilets and showers? Why garbage up to the ceiling? That's what I don't understand. I can't handle a few crumbs on my kitchen floor. I can't handle toys in the front room or things out of place. I can't function when things are crazy, so I can't understand how they can live in homes that are falling apart, smell horrible,have no running water, have 41 animal skeltons, laying around, bug infestations, poop on the ground, mice droppings everywhere, rotting food, mold covered items, dirt and trash everywhere, no room to walk, or sleep or sit. How do they do it? And how are they not in the hospital with funky disease's? I am just blown away. I am a little overwhelmed with it, but I can't stop. I guess all i can do is pray for them right?