Sick kids...

Willow & Grace were both feeling TERRIBLE at the beginning of the week, but knowing I was taking Willow in on Wed for shots, I didn't take them in before that. I was pretty sure Willow had an ear infection and sure enough it was a double one. Grace was miserable with pink all around her eye and she ended up with a viral infection and an ear infection in the left ear as well! So off to Walmart we ran to pick up meds... or so I thought.
Long story short, there were complications with insurance, a ton of calls back and forth to the Dr and Pharmacy,trying to pick it up 3 different times 10, 12, 3:00 that day with no luck, mistakes on on Pharmacy's end (like filling the meds wrong and telling me to come back the next day after 3:00 to get it) FINALLY, after 4 trips to Walmart to pick up medicine for my sick babies- we got it! VICTORY!!! And needless to say, they are feeling much better. I am grateful for medicine!!! Now, Daisy is sick with a nasty cough... so we are home from church trying to keep the germs from spreading. I hate the flu season!!!

Craft show next Saturday!

I will be in a craft show next weekend and wanted to let you know incase you are looking for inexpensive Chiristams, birthday or baby gifts. I will have a huge variety again this year all for great prices (who isn't struggling these days?) It will be at the same church as last time, near Lonestar & Midland. 9AM-4PM
(I'll get the exact address soon as well as a full list of crafts later!)
Just wanted to let you know to save the date for Nov 20th!

A very, very sad baby...

Is it terrible of me to snap pictures while my baby is crying at the top of her lungs? If so, I'm sorry. She woke up today from her nap not happy at all. I couldn't stop laughing at her hair! What on earth has she doing?!! Oh, sweet Willow- it will get better, I promise.

Happy Birthday Travis! Old 33!

I completely forgot to post these super awesome pictures of Trav's birthday party. His b-day fell on the same night as our trunk or treat, so we went over to his parents after to have cupcakes with the cousins. It was a quick event because it was past bedtime, but at least we sang and opened presents! I love Trav with all my heart, he is an amazinly good man. I am blessed to have him in my life.

Cement...

This morning I was brought to tears after I recieved an answer to a question I had been asking God for most of my life...

The truth is, I've really been struggling lately. Amazing I know. I can fool the universe if I try- but honestly, really struggling.
It's no mystery, dealing with depression since I was 8, it's just apart of my world, Mom calls it a vally right now.
I feel lost, sad, broken, unsure, insecure, terribly alone, panicked, unworthy, unloved, invisable, unraveled, ignored & disconnected from so many things. In one of my late night crying sessions with Andrea, I balled my eyes out pleading: "Why do I always have to be the strong one? Why do I have to keep it together all the time? Why do I always have to be the one calling others? Checking to see if everyone is ok when I am falling apart every single second and noboday has a clue?"
My main question for God has always been: "Why do I have to be so strong? I was born a warrior- but trust me, I get tired. I am exhausted every single second of my life because I never stop fighting this battle...

So on the way back from dropping Grace off at preschool, Daisy asked, " Mom, why does cement have to be so strong? Not thinking at all, I blurted out," Because it has to be honey. That's it's job. Somethings were made to be strong, somethings were made to be weak or fragile. But cement has to be strong because it's job is to keep things together, to help things not fall apart. Imagine how the world would be without it, God knew what he was doing making cement strong."

...and then it hit me. I was no longer talking to my 5 year old daughter about cement, God was reminding me why I had to be strong. " It's how I made you Em. you keep things together. It's your job. You keep things from falling apart. Think how the world would be if I made you any other way..."

I drove home in tears because it isn't always easy being the cement...

Bronchitis, X-rays & a torn muscle...

I adore my husband, but when I caught his cold a month ago, I wasn't thrilled with his affection. I told him a million times, "Don't get near me, don't kiss me right now, cover your mouth, cough in your sleeve, and WASH YOUR HANDS!!! Well, sure enough, I caught what he had and I was not a happy camper. For 2 1/2 weeks I could not stop coughing- it was in my lungs and it wouldn't stop! I was miserable, sore and tired of hacking my nasty germs all over the place.
11 days ago something happened in the middle of the day and I felt the worst stabbing pain in my ribs. I couldn't take a full breath, it hurt to move, coughing hurt beyond description, lifting made me want to cry,laying down absoultly killed and I knew I was in trouble.
(I had bronchitis years ago when I just had Tristin & coughed so hard I bumped a rib out of place. It was awful. I think Christy took me to the ER that day to get it checked out. And if felt like the same kind of pain.)Beautiful.
Anyway, everyday I kept thinking it would get better, and everyday that passed, it seemed to get worse. I called off my houses, because everything hurt too much, took ton of Advil and prayed it would heal. But, on day 8 of wanting to chop my ribs off, I knew I had to get in and make sure something wasn't seriously wrong. I finally went to the Dr. on monday where he gave me antibiotics for the Bronchitis, pain meds that I can't take anyway, x-rays that confirmed I hadn't broken or fractured any ribs or punctured any lungs. So that was great to hear!
What we did find out was there's a torn muscle between the ribs which is why life has pretty much terrible for the past 11 days.We assumed that's what happened, but I'm glad I went in for x-rays, just to make sure. I'm sure the Dr bill will make me wish I had just chopped my ribs off instead, but I guess I'll cross that road when I get there. (Please insurance, be kind!)

It just hurts. Everything. Pushing, pulling, lifting, breathing, coughing, sleeping, cleaning, closing the van door, bending over,taking the wet clothes out of the laundry, shopping, picking up babies, making dinner, changing clothes etc...

Sometimes I wonder, as a Mom, do we ever get to rest? Do we ever get a moment? Someday, will we ever have someone rushing to help us? But the answer is... probably not. That's why we are the Mom, and God made us all Super Woman with an amazing glitterly cape and magic wand that makes it all better.

Halloween...

As the kids get older and their love for candy grows, so does their love for Halloween. I have to admit, I am obsessed with junk food, and I went trick or treating WAY passed the age that a girl should! My addiction makes me happy, what can I say? And what is it about dumping your kids loot out on the floor and getting all excited as you organize the candy into baggies? Pure love, thats what i call it.
This year tristin was a vampire, the older girls were rock stars and Willow was a pumpkin. The girls had fun helping me make their guitars and they got to wear MAKE UP!!! Yup, mascara, lipstick, blush, eye shadow and everything! I was pretty awesome that night, let me tell you!
Willow was adorable knocking on the doors trying to find all the doggies barking behind them. She was delighted when a cute old lady would answer with her howling dog trying to escape behind her. She loved it, and the candy too.

In the leaves...

The girls were playing in the leaves the other day so I got a few pictures. They look so grown up!

Grace's head is healing!!!

It took me awhile to even look at her head after surviving the whole ordeal, but happily, she is better. Her head is super cute now! Hopefully she won't have a scar on her forhead, but we will see. At least we don't have blood puring out, right?

Family Night @ school...

The kids didn't have their usual Halloween carnival this year, but it was fun anyway! They didn't do their anual fundraiser, instead, made the whole night free for families. The kids didn't know the difference and won free books at the book walk, ate donuts and cider, went on a hayride, listened to a story and played a few games. They had a great time...